About a week ago, I read a very heartbreaking story on Twitter. The story was about a lady who got scammed with marriage.
She met a guy on Snapchat and they got talking and before you know what's going on, they are already doing lovey lovey, started visiting each other and all that. She even got pregnant. They were living in UK.
According to her, she said that she thought she has found love, someone she can spend the rest of life with and someone she can start a family with which has been her desire but that was not the case.
The guy had another mission, he's not looking for love, a wife or someone to start a family with, he never loved the girl, everything he did was all pretence. His papers had expired, so he was looking for a way to renew them and even get permanent stay.
He deceived the girl, they got married, did everything but he wasn't planning to stay married but to use marriage and his daughter, who has been given birth to, as a bait to get his papers and move on with his life.
When this lady got the hint of it, she was heartbroken, hurt and pained. She exposed and called the guy out on social media so other ladies will take note of him and not fall victim.
I feel for her honestly and I pray she heals and find true love but what are the lessons here for us to learn?
1. Seek the face of God before you make a marital decision
We have many wolves in sheep clothing going about looking for someone they will scam and take advantage of. We have many claiming to be what they are not. They are many that are even worse than this guy so don't make a decision in isolation from God, let Him lead you.
The Bible says when we seek the face of God first, every other thing will have fall in place(Matt. 6:33). Just imagine that this lady sought His face before committing to this guy, this heavy disappointment would have been averted.
Many are neglecting the God factor in their marital decisions, little surprise the heartbreaks, pains and injuries. The point is, before you commit to anyone fully, seek the face of God.
2. Investigate the person before you commit yourself
This is not a matter of not trusting what the person told you but to confirm what you have been told, which can even strengthen the trust the more if your discoveries are in conformity with what you've been told.
What the person told you about his or her means of livelihood, is it so?
The person told you that he has never been married before, is it so?
He told you that you're the only one, is he so?
She told you that she has never had a kid for someone else before, is it so?
He told you that he loves you, you're the sugar in his tea, the butter in his bread bla bla bla, is it so?
What he told you about where he came from, where he his living, working etc, are they so?
What he told you about his family, is it so?
Don't take anyone on face value until you have made your investigations. Don't be moved by the fact that he's rich, tall, dark and handsome, or that she's beautiful and heavily blessed by heaven front and back. All these are secondary and supplements. They're important, no doubt. But go deeper. Know the "person" in the person.
You can make your investigations through prayers, the secret things belongs to God(Deut. 29:29), you can give him emergency visit to his office or house, you can ask friends, colleagues, siblings and neighbors around.
What other lessons can you derive from this story, do let me know in the comment section below.
Thanks for reading
#SinglesMatters
© Okolie Samuel
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